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I remembered my Grandmother today….And Remembered the Bhajan We composed few years back…She wanted me to compose a ‘Bhajan’ genre..I was really not sure If I can do that…But we decided to do…She use to worship GOD RAMA a lot…So we wrote few lines on HIM and I composed it with My Guitar…Today after singing this I am feeling So NICE …But this composition is Little tricky to Sing with VEENA …
BUT I am not sure…in the sequence of Hard Rock and Techno music on Muziboo…if anybody would like this really…
I added few aalaps in the begining to just give a new make up and recorded on a Veena …No Rhythm..
Song: Saang Ramaraya (means Tell me Lord RAMA )
Lyrics: Malati Gokhale(My Late Grand Mother)
Compsoed and Sung by: Shashank Gokhale
NOTE : I am a Illiterate in Classical music and RAGA …It would sound funny to ask this, but if some expert can tell me in which RAGA sounds through this Composition…as I did compose but I am unaware of RAGA in which I composed…. :D
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Shashank.. this is definitely not my genre of music.. but its really commendable that you did this for your grandmother. As far as the raaga.. I am not sure man.. I fall in the illiterate category :-) I studied some carnatic when I was a kid, but have forgotten everything.. You have sung it well and I can definitely see that you’ve sung this from your heart..Your Grandmother would be proud!!
Neat!! I mean, this is something different.. I heard the new composition of a Bhajan by Joe.. However, This one has got some great story behind it too.. I am another illiterate when it comes to classical style of music but I have just tried to see how we could improve this song with the richness that it already has..
Shashank, I don’t know Marathi but I do understand some of it as my mother tongue is Konkani.. Also, I used to play percussion instruments when we used to have Bhajan sessions at home way back when I was a kid.. So, I guess that gives me an edge to figure out what the next note could be as you sing or sense which note is not sounding right to that matter..
Some places where you may want to get the notes right are listed below.. This is in the order how the song progresses.. I kept listening to the song again and again so that I could note it..
* The alaap needs to be worked on.. Specially towards the ending..
* Tujha krupe vina…
* Bhakti stava..
* Bhakti rasane..
* Palana haara..
* Kase midhyau.. (the one in the end) it was a singing error.. You went flat here..
Also, I felt the song would sound even better if the tempo was increased. I would like to know what you think and if anybody else has anything to add to this.. May god bless you.. \m/
DJ
“Its all bout music and it always will be!”
@George….Thanks for Comment and taking time out to listen to this…I am really very glad that you could felt the emmotions behind it…
@Deepak…Voooooh! Thats a very big comment… :D…Thanks man I like this very much when you thoroughly judge the song…Here are my Replies:
->The alaap needs to be worked on.. Specially towards the ending.. [Shashank: Agreed. I need to learn to plan Aalap neatly…its would be good for composition also]
-Tujha krupe vina… [Shashank: Deepak, the tune of the Bhajan is like that…nothing really wrong in it. Its all because of the VEENA in background…Veena is backing with 2 notes PA(G) and SA© only…and here my song goes in some SHARP notes…If I play on some Synth…it would sound Perfect]
-Bhakti stava.. [Shashank: Crazy tune of Bhajan.. :D]
-Bhakti rasane..[Shashank: Crazy tune of Bhajan.. :D]
-Palana haara..[Shashank: Crazy tune of Bhajan.. :D]
-Kase midhyau.. (the one in the end) it was a singing error.. You went flat here.. [Shashank: Agreed. A tiny little Dipping…I need to Fix that…]
– TEMPO [Shashank: Yes…the Bhajan is faster than now…I tried getting some BHAJANI Taal sample from internet…But they were not good enough…If you have some Loops for Bhajani Taal loops…can you forward me ? Wud also like to have the FILL IN part of the Bhajani taal.. :D]
hi shashank,
Its very nice tht you composed this bhajan for ur grandmother…thts why this song looks close to ur heart. ur voice is good for bhajans also. and i liked the tune very much…..i really felt the presence of divine power while listening to this bhajan….........
nice composition
and nice lyrics
Hey Shanky,
just listened to your bhajan. I’m afraid this genre is not my cup of tea, but you have sung it in a very heartfelt way, so it doesn’t really matter if you hit the odd note or two.
Keep it up!
Hi Shashank! I liked it, very well composed and lyrics also good..lita a bit here n there doesnt matter coz when u’ll, I mean if u record it in a studio every thing u’ll take care of to get it right.
Bottom line is …..Sounds good to me
Sharvari, thanks for your Comments...I wonder why I didn't play it in front of you ever....I am sure your dad gonna like this too...<br/><br/>Susmit, glad you got time to listen to it…Singing on veena was trciky yaar…This got the Sharp Notes in the composition…So backing track made felt many listeners that I am Singing some out of scale…This is one more the crazy tune…@Prem, Thanks for your precious comment…I am sure my parents gonna like all these comments and would be very proud of me and their mother…
You have composed and sung this song with such a sweetness and purity… that there is nothing left to say about improvement as far as i understand. It also shows how much you love your grandmother. If we live in a age of techno and rock .. this song sends the message to never forget god and our elders. God bless you shashank
hi shashank although i dont understand Marathi,but still i can try figure out hw it is sung….
well first thing is ALAP u need to work on it,its starting n end is not well,midway it goes well.
rest i cant comment….
overall i liked it….keep singing n COMPOSING too
Hi Shashank, I liked the feel of the song…Though you dont know what raaga it is, you wud have stuck to some scale that u know of.
At 1.28 to 1.31 kinds, i thought you cud have sung better, i am not able to get a grip of the tune there. i mean the tune is off the mainstream feel, the same feedback for the next stanza when this repeats..am not sure if you are getting what i am trying to say though :) Please let me know what u felt after listening to that part
Shashank though I am not so much into this genre, you have a feel.
I also generally agree with what Nithya says and the others have expressed.
Hi Shashank.. I had not first read your comment completely, so I was about to write that this is not in any particular raag, and much more :-) .. but inspite of not being aware of a raag, you have composed it so well. Great work, but to call it a “composition” I think all the other ingredients like binding it to a raag (to the leat) needs to be done. If you ask me what raag this “resembles” is Raag Yaman.. CORRECT ME SANJEEB and others if I am wrong. But since the tune varies at different places, it will sound like other raags as well, but Yaman is what I think it is very close to.
Singing is flawless. No issues with that.
And, in the background do you have a Tanpura or VEENA ? It did not sound like VEENA though..
Overall great work Shashank. Much appreciated..
Also, to tell more about the Veena (Tanpura actually), it is typically set to Sa and Pa (unless your song is set to raag, which does not involve Pa, such as Malkauns, in which case Tanpura is Set to “Ma” on the first string and Sa on the rest 3). Why? because it covers entire “Saptak” – the seven notes’ scale. So, Tujha krupe vina… line is not the fault of the Tanpura, it is that of the composition.
Hi All,
Thanks for taking your time out to comment on this…Some Problem is really because of Veena(tanpura) set on SA© and PA(G) note…and My composition(tune) went into SHARP notes also…So there is where you feel something wrong…
I Felt it while recording also…I was not able to sing the Correct notes of the tune becuase of the tanpura…So its the fault of composition or me who decided to use Tanpura for the Tune which has SHARP notes… :D
Hey Shashank, only now I could listen to this. Although I don’t know what the lyrics say, the tune is lovely. Yes, the singing needs a little bit fine tuning, but I loved the composition. Great job!
What I like about this is that it follows the feel of the lyrics. Sometimes a single raaga does not do justice to the feel of the composition. However the classically trained people are limited by their training. So not sticking to the raaga, according to me is a plus point. That said, there are some parts where you are singing in between the two notes, either flat or sharp, I cannot make out because I don’t know what ‘you’ want to sing.
The alaap needs to be worked on.. [Ananth: I agree too]
Tujha krupe vina… [Ananth:The note at ‘kR’ in kRupe is somewhere in between]
Bhakti stava.. [Ananth:Actually the note on ‘Je’ in jeevan]
Bhakti rasane.. [Ananth:Thats fine]
Palana haara.. [Ananth:Actually the problem is at ‘Tujha’ Ansh and both the times you have sung it it is somewhere else. Second time it sound more flat than the first, but still not striking a particular note, I think.]
Mata pita tu..[Ananth: It is again off I think at ‘tu’]
Kase mi dhyau.. (the one in the end) it was a singing error.. You went flat here.. [Ananth: It does not follow the follow the same tune as you sang in the rest of the places, but it sounds like a variation and not an off note.]
In general, you need to focus on voice stability, especially for compositions like this. Where the tune deviates from the usual mood, the note have to be sung with even more confidence so that the listner knows that this deviation is intentional.
Sorry for the long comment, but I liked it and you seem to have a lot of potential as a composer. I wish to hear more from you after removing he chinks from your armour.
Wow, What a detailed comment… :D
I am really glad you got time to evaluate it so closely…
I would certainly take care of these suggestions…
Thanks for thinking that I am a composer..There are not many who think like you…. :D
This is just from a very basic listeners oint of view….Its good beginning …keeep it up
its really good, she will be happy u r a gr8 person hats off
Baba saidshank you r wonderfl boy .i am proud of u.Deepak